The WAY

Wooo...! Just finished Miyamoto Musashi by Eji Yoshikawa. I've waited like 5 years? to get my hands on the book... always turned away by the cost. But finally, Kinokuniya has done it again with a paperback at only $40 haha...

Miyamoto Musashi... a real life person living in 15th? Century Japan, considered the greatest Swordsman ever, albeit the controversy surrounding him. His Way of the Samurai appeals to me tremendously as i read the book and did some digging on the internet. Here is a man who dared to throw his whole life into the pursuit of something he could only vaguely grasp. A dream?

Only recently i was admonished by someone much younger than me for having my head in the clouds, living in my own fantasy world, ignoring the real world and refusing to acknowledge reality.

I tried but failed to convey my thoughts and feelings across, which probably resulted in alot of misunderstanding. I can't, probably because i'm still seeking...

Of course it would be much simpler and seemingly wiser to just do what others are doing, follow what has been taught and just go along with what the rest of the world is doing. But just like Musashi, i too have come to realise something about my life and of this world that we live in, and i have to find out what exactly it is. How do i explain what i feel? I'm at a loss argh... All i know is that if i do not follow the urgings of my soul in this, i would be giving up my right to exist as an individual and become just another faceless person on this world going through my 70 odd years on this world, taking nothing nor leaving anything behind.

I'm not getting any younger i know. Fast approaching 30 and looking at the progress (can i even say progress???) i've made, even i am on the verge of panicking at times. So long as i'm still on this path that i've chosen, i'll appear unreliable and unstable to the people around me, ie. forget about setting up a family dude. I've always yearned to set up my own family and have my own kids. But i suppose if its not going to happen so be it. Seriously i'm more worried that i'll never attain the Truth that i'm seeking. That i've lost the Way to it.

Jesus said He is the Way and the Truth. Could it be because i've drifted from Him that i'm starting to doubt?

Descartes asked: What can we know for certain? His answer to the question was: I Think, therefore I Am. That we can only be sure of our own existence because we think. And that is what i've been pondering 13 years ago when i was thinking about life and death, about what it means to exist and about the existence of other things. Oh how many times have i wondered if everything else was just my imagination? How many times have i wondered if the other person really existed since there was no way for me to prove that he could actually think, as i did? For all i know i may be conjuring him up in my brain. Just like how everything seems so real in dreams with each character having their own form and personality, able to communicate with yourself.

You know what, i'm just confusing myself and everyone who's reading this. Next thing i know i'm gonna get worried looks and another talk with the pastor -..-

K800i for Sale...

Great... suddenly the whole army's taking a strong stand against camera phones. Given till 1 Oct to change our phones... Bah... I'm soooooo in love with my K800i!!!!! What the... Anyway, if anyone's willing to buy a import set K800i, one key on the keypad scratched by my nail, the camera cover scratched slightly by the CASE -..-, let me know ya. Prob in the range of $500 if possible... Negotiable i guess. BAH.

Disconnected

Thats the view from the bed i'm lying on.. Double decker. I feel like i'm so disconnected from everything, everyone else. Its what ppl call loneliness? But i think in my case it goes further than that. Perhaps its simply reached the age where the inner man within yearn for his soul mate? Not just a companion. Someone whose soul connects with your own. Yet looking in the mirror i do not think i'm ready altho i wish i am. In fact i probably deserve to live out my life alone. I've repeated that to myself countless times.. Tried losing myself in my games.. Travelled.. Yet i've only succeeded in making that emptiness in myself more pronounced. The gap that even God can't fill. Or it could be that i'm keeping Him out on purpose. My spirit cries out "i don't want to be alone!" hoping for someone to hear me. To understand me. To kick me telling me to shut up. But i don't envision that happening anytime soon. Where's the power plug? I wish i could pull it out. No resets for me. I don't deserve it. Argh.. Another cloudy day in my world..

台湾旅游记

不知道如果我真的全用华文把整个旅程的经过写出来的话，会有多少人想把我给杀掉 ^ ^

Anyway... (PHEW!) its really too tiring typing in hanyu pinyin.

First off, i would like to state that the Taiwan trip was NOT a bed of roses as others had led me to believe prior to the trip. Ok it might have been for some, but not me. Basically the only day i wasn't out in the sun with my guys were the 1st day when we arrived, and the last day when everyone was cleaning their weapons and getting ready to leave the place once everything was returned. -..- i was already a lobster on the 3rd day and by the 5th i was darker than Nigel, my Chindian companion. Seriously! We compared our skin tones and he admitted i was darker. DUH.

Breakdown of Boot Camp.

1st Day - Reach, settle admin, go out for recce (1st contact at distance with the 槟榔西施 ^ ^

2nd Day - Supervising training for my Combat Engineers guys. Oh btw, whats wrong with the School? Their drills are a mess. They don't even know the dimensions of certain wire obstacles! Gawd...

3rd Day - Controller for one of the platoons for their Platoon Battle Course. Basically alot of walking (almost cramp... been too long... way too long...), climbing, bashing and shouting.

4th Day - Controller for Urban Ops Training, which is basically fighting in buildings. Machiam Counter Strike, except that bullets and grenades are controlled by the few of us. Imagine 5 guys, 100 people shooting... Alot of unpleasantness cos of little boys complaining "I f***ing shot him a dozen times why isn't he dead? F*** you! You're dead! Stop shooting at us!" -..- Seriously, almost exact words. DUH.

5th to 7th Day - Repeat first 3 days cycle with other group who were doing Navigation Exercise. Basically a swap over. SIGH.

8th to 10th Day - Tagging along for Company Mission. ALOT of walking. Imagine taking a vehicle driving from camp onto the expressway and travelling for like 30mins before dropping off at the START point to make our way back to the training area behind our camp. Its REALLY far...

11th & 12th Day - Ok mistake earlier, i had ONE more day to slack. Cos they took TWO days to settle the admin before we left for our R&R.

13th to 15th Day - R&R!

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Ok i think you can imagine what it was like for me for the training portion, with the aid of the pics i posted up, so i shall not bore anyone with details.

R&R - Taipei!

Actually, R&R isn't what you think it is either... The first 2 days were controlled. In other words we had a tour guide and were forced to visit amusement parks outside of Taipei, some place dedicated to the Taiwanese war heroes and a Chinese Heritage Museum. Oh we're free at night, however we had to switch hotels every night cos of some admin issue. Which means by the time we get our rooms its around 8pm? And we have to be back in our hotels by 11pm -..- The only really free "day" is the 3rd day of R&R, but then we gotta be back by 4pm to take the bus to the airport and fly back home. DUH.

***

Amusement Parks

We went to 2 amusement parks. The first one i didn't catch the name. The second one was some 六福 place. The first one had a couple of interesting rides. For some unknown reason i didn't take pictures of videos of it hmmm...

Anyway one of the rides is simple, just this 2 rows of seats. Kinda like benches except its individual seating. The thing rotates up, and the seats rotate as well. Pretty exciting especially when you're dangling like 10ft in the air facing the crowd below, held up only by the safety of your seat straps AND descending SUPER SLOWLY at like 1cm per second... Oh did i mention the fountain below us happily spewing water? We stopped and snapped back upright just as we were about to drink from it -..-

Then there was the roller coaster ride. This one i did take a vid of. Basically you roll off, up the tracks to the top and then when everyone's on top in one straight line the coaster stops. THEN the INTERESTING part happens. The WHOLE track breaks off and swings downwards... until it connects with the track that is perpendicular to it. You get to hang there for like an eternity at that 90 degree position and then it suddenly lets go, dropping you into the gaping hole like a 100m below, exploding back unto the surface and going through a few hoops before ending. Oh guess who was in the first seat? ^ ^ The most exciting moment was the hanging portion and the drop i guess. Hehe... Airborne training really helps. In fact, immediately after we got off, we ran all the way up again for a consecutive ride. So happens not many ppl were playing it... I wonder why? :p



The only interesting ride in the other amusement park was this SPEED version of viking. Basically you strap on with your feet dangling in the air, roller coaster style. You speed forward and up the tracks into the air, then reverse in like double the speed, NOT gravity only the machine was driving us back with force, same thing up the other end and back down at triple the speed and up the tracks again which ends with some twists... seriously felt like i was gonna hit the end and fly off. Again in first seat lol... Going backwards was ok, going forward was exhilarating ^ ^

It was fun watching whoever suay enough to be pulled along by me to sit in the first seat grip his safety harness tight whenever the ride starts haha... Can really see veins popping lor... As for me... my hands are always in the air hahaha... ;)



***

Finally our nights. 1st night was Wednesday night, ladies night in Taipei, and we went to this popular joint in town called Luxy. You can google Luxy Taipei to find the official website heh. The girls are JUDE. Friendly, pretty, sexy... Haha... Didn't take any pictures, but there's one video of the dancers on stage. Interesting experience. But NOTHING happened ^ ^ Oh btw i still have half a bottle of Johnny Walker there for half 3 months haha... Cos the table was under my name mahhh...



2nd night we went to the night markets like Ximending and Shilin. So-so la... For some reason i kept wishing Cassie was there. Just know she'd go wild at the sight of so many shops haha... (She IS already talking about our next trip... IF her bf lets her heh)

And the last day... i burst my budget all because of stupid SOGO. Normally when you go overseas you'd avoid shopping centres right? But it so happened that they were just opening when we reached so we loitered around watching the Jap culture store opening... And thought why not? In we went. Ended up buying an Oakley bag, an Oakley pouch, 2 Collectors' Transformers... Gone case lol...

Video's kinda long...




***

There done. R&R not too interesting in my opinion. Maybe cos of the company i was with? Suspect that i would have enjoyed it more with other people... like female people hahaha... Anyway ya... The videos will be added soon, so piece together your own conclusion from the pics, vids and this wordy entry ^ ^

Tidbits while waiting

No time to do up the pictures yet.. Meanwhile here's me in my Taiwan uniform with a Taiwan tank :)

Justus Returns

I'm back.. And immediately thrown tons of work even before i've set a single foot in camp! Won't get a chance to either.. Deployed outside till Wed as far as i know for now. Training programme's a mess. Tsk tsk.. They just can't run the army without me can they? Haha.. Anyway, shall upload pictures of my Taiwan trip along with "stories" once i get the chance to actually go home for one night.. For the not as enlightened, yea i'm using my phone to blog as can be seen from the hopeless formatting.. Oh and ya.. Tell me you miss me.. Need some love ;)